The blood counts

And the next test is in. Apart from low (3.2) white blood count and platelet count of 141 which is also a tad low, Steven's blood counts are doing good. Now I am off to go and read about what happens when these counts are low. Thankfully they are not too way down there and the next test which is another two weeks away, will tell more and hopefully even see these settled down. But its good..... On 14th June we are headed back up to the specialist at Vanderbilt, Nashville and that test will give us an even better idea of where 'things' are headed.

I find myself smiling at referring to cancer as 'things'.......... just the fact that it brings a smile to my face, makes me wonder at the long road already ridden in this journey - in such a short space of time.. and this brings another smile in knowledge that we are, after all, dealing with this - so far.

Steven is looking good, but tired today. But hey, its weekend and everyone that age should be tired after a weekend! He is obviously enjoying the car with the new motor in it too.... nice to see him and Laura smiling and getting on with life. And good to hear how healthy that car sounds as Steven 'guns' it down the road for the benefit of his mama who is standing watching! :-) I told him to do that for me and he had no objection to complying...

I find myself breathing easier again - its always like this around a test time - my blood pressure rises, I find myself a tad rattier and tense and then it all evens out again when I get that hug with the piece of paper that says "its ok". And then it is "ok" again, until the next test looms.

I was thinking just today, that we really are SO lucky! Steven is healthy otherwise, is a 'kid' that looks after himself, leads a drug free (apart from Gleevec, obviously) life and has a plan for his future. Imagine having to try to care for a child/person that was already on a 'self destruct' path..... I could not imagine the worry that goes with that.

I have also been thinking about something a friend wrote- how does one live knowing that you cannot plan for a future - is it even possible to live 'in the moment' without thinking about the future? I dont know, my friend, I dont know. I tried to do that numerous times today, and failed. Just know that that question alone has made me even more grateful that I can plan ahead with reasonable expectation of being able to carry out those plans. I hope to hang on to that thought for a good long time, Penny - and I know that as long as I have a future - you will be in my heart.

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